Chapter 85

Third-person's POV After Felicity's confession, he could not look Elyana directly in the eyes. He was waiting for a hard slap on the face with some hateful curses, but he did not get one from his best friend. His palms were sweating, even though it was cold inside the room. He felt an unexplainable fear that he had never felt in his entire life, more so during those times when his father found out he was gay. If he could compare, that moment was like his last day on Earth, like he was facing the last judgment, even though he already knew where he would end. What he did is enough to be hated. He kept that secret hidden for a few months while pretending he was innocent, even if they lived under the same roof during that time. He admitted that he only felt a great deal of guilt on the day his secret was revealed and that he lacked the strength to look Elyana in the eyes and apologize for messing up her life in that way. He knew Elyana was looking intently at him and the moment he would raise his head, he would see her eyes and the madness through them. 'Did Quintin tell her?' he thought because it was only him, Chelsea, and his mother who knew about that secret. He knew his mother wouldn't tell Elyana about it and Chelsea would not do the same because they had already talked about it. It was only Quintin he could suspect, nothing else, and thinking about Quintin made him curse him to the bone, but he realized there was no reason for him to hate Quintin because he was only helping. 'There's no turning back. I should face her now,' Felicity muttered, slowly raising his head, and just like what he thought, he immediately caught Elyana's eyes. But the surprising part of it was that Elyana's gaze didn't seem to be the way he was expecting it at that time. She didn't seem to be mad. She was looking seriously at him, making it difficult for Felicity to read what Elyana was thinking. "E-Ellie..." Felicity stammered when he called Elyana's attention. Elyana only blinked her eyes and no words came out of her mouth. She intentionally kept herself silent to give Felicity time to explain himself because she knew he had reason and that was what she wanted to know before reacting harshly towards him. "I-I'm so sorry. I didn't have any bad intentions when I did what I did. It's just that, I was afraid to confess to you because your pregnancy has been delicate lately. You shouldn't be stressed, right? That's why I hid it," he started. He was bowing his head while talking because he couldn't take a few seconds to look into Elyana's eyes. "I'm very sorry I didn't tell you. I got scared, but it didn't mean I didn't have any plan to tell you the truth. I was only finding the right time," he deeply apologized in the most gentle way possible. Felicity raised his head again after he finished talking; however, Elyana remained silent, like she was still processing everything inside her head, even though it was not that like that. She wanted to hear more, expecting some great reasons. "By what reason?" Elyana finally spoke. Felicity was about to open his mouth to speak when Elyana added more questions, one after another. "Why did you do that? Did you even think I could get pregnant with your child? That you would become the biological father of an offspring and the mother was your best friend?" Felicity felt some embarrassment while hearing those questions. He didn't think of those when he handed Quintin the small container, but those same questions crossed his mind as the days went by until he finally heard the news that Elyana was pregnant. "I know that it might work. But at that time...I just want to keep Quintin away from future problems and I also thought, It's better that he not be the father of your child because he doesn't deserve it," he blurted. Elyana raised an eyebrow. "And what made you think he's not deserving?" she annoyingly asked. Felicity looked away when he saw her reaction. He didn't think she would defend Quintin that day, even though they both knew what kind of man he was. "I-I just thought so," he quickly answered, avoiding her gaze. "And what now? Just that?" Elyana was still unsatisfied. For her, she wanted more words from her best friend. In other words, his thoughts and plans were in mind because everything seemed like an empty container, a blank sheet of paper that she was near ripping in parts because of annoyance. "What do you want me to say, girl?" Felicity returned and Elyana just brushed her face using both hands because it seemed her best friend didn't even have plans. It would have been easier if he had. They could make a contract just like what she did with Quintin, but she couldn't understand why her mind didn't want to agree with the same setup when it came to her best friend. She didn't want Felicity to be out of sight, but how if he was like that? She was about to ask again when Felicity interrupted her with this, "For the record, I didn't regret what I did," he uttered while looking away, yet, Elyana could see into Felicity's eyes a deep kind of emotion. She thought he was done, but he continued afterward and this time, he was already looking into Elyana's eyes and she saw how tears slowly formed in both corners of his eyes. "I never felt I would be happier when I first saw the baby and if you would let me, I want to be part of his life. I won't mind if you keep it a secret from him that I am his father, as long as you don't take him away from me," Felicity bravely let out. Elyana was close to opening up about those, but to witness how much that action would hurt Felicity, she changed her mind. She couldn't just take the baby away, knowing she would be hurting the person who had always been by her side during those times she was fighting her battles. How could she decide on removing him from their lives if he, who was gay, was the one who fulfilled her one greatest desire to be a mother? "Are you doubting yourself?" she asked without removing her sight of him. Elyana saw how Felicity's shoulder suddenly dropped. His expression changed from being hopeful to hopeless. "D-Did you forget that I'm gay? I'm not doubting myself but there are possibilities that people will think differently," he murmured like his self-confidence was as low as his sole at that moment. Elyana could feel it and she wanted to raise it as high as she could. "Why would you care? Do you care more about what other people would say? Since when do you care about other people's opinions?" Felicity was getting puzzled this time. He could not understand exactly what Elyana was getting at. She was giving him the thought that what he did was fine with her when all he wanted was to make Elyana mad at him. "Even if we say you sought a doctor's help and I was just your donor, it is still wrong in many eyes and beliefs that I—a gay is your son's father," he replied, just to turn their conversation into the way he wanted. "In that case, why didn't you just stop me that day so it wouldn't have led to this?" Elyana rolled her eyes at him, forcing him to swallow his saliva. Elyana had a point. That question made him speechless for a moment before he finally found the right words. "F-from what I remember, we were not on good terms at that time so I didn't show up." "Oh, you're right, you were ignoring me that time, and why were you doing so?" Elyana crossed her arms on her chest while looking sharply at Felicity. She remembered those days clearly and because Felicity opened it up, she already took the chance to put him in the hot seat. "I think I already answered that before." Felicity tried to avoid the question and to finish it off, he added, "You know, if you could just stick to your first plan to keep your donor's name a secret, it wouldn't be a problem with me." "NO! I WON'T LET THAT!" Both of them froze when they heard a masculine voice scream behind Felicity. The door was halfway opened and two unexpected people were standing in the doorway. The two walked in. "Felicity, we could talk about this. We know how much help you have given our daughter since she returned. I object to your decision; my grandson has the right to know his father," Cihan pleaded right after approaching Felicity, who couldn't move both his legs. He had been taken by surprise. He didn't even hear the door open behind him. "Your uncle is right, Felicity," Marietta agreed. She even reached for both of Felicity's hands, squeezing his cold palms while looking straight at him with her pleading eyes. 'What exactly was happening? Why are they not mad at me?' Felicity asked himself. It was contrary to his expectations. "W-why? Why are none of you mad at me?" he nervously asked them. "What made you think that we would get mad?" Cihan answered with a smile. Felicity's eyes grew teary. All of his fears vanished in an instant. Everything at the time was beyond his expectations. They proved to him even more that the care they showed him during the time his father kicked him out of their house was real. Although he was not kicked out, he chose to leave to take the path of his choice, and the Begum were those who gave him the fullest support that his father couldn't. Felicity took a deep breath. There was a breath of relief because they wouldn't take his baby away, however, there was one request from Elyana's father that shook both of their worlds.